I’m so bored all of the time. I’m actually so bored today that I was doing a Google search on boredom. I’d have to say, that after reading about clinical boredom, I could probably add that to my other mental disorders. My interest level in anything is about zero. I don’t get any sense of pleasure or enjoyment from anything. It could be the psych meds. I know I need the leveling of moods but sometimes it doesn’t seem worth it.
I have absolutely no focus on anything. The things I have to do become a grueling exercise in tedium. I don’t even enjoy drawing anymore. Reading is impossible. I can get through short news articles on the Web but books are out of the question. Every little noise distracts me and I completely forget what I’ve just read. Lately, I’ve been so bored that all I want to do is sleep. As soon as I sit down to do something, I get drowsy. Days seem to blur together and have no meaning.
The doctor just increased my Lexapro to try to reduce my anxiety. So far, I’m not noticing much difference. I know it could take weeks to show results so I have to be patient. It will be a long wait since I obsessively worry over every small thing.
OK. Here is a rant. I hate commercial radio. It just plain sucks. The rotation of the same music over and over and over again is mind numbing. The worst part of the day is something the local channel, WDVE, calls “the Electric Lunch.” This is from noon to 1 pm and the idiots can call in to request songs. OH…MY…GOD! Every fucking day, the sheeple call in requesting the same overplayed songs. How many times can a person listen to Stairway To Heaven or Freebird? Come on, if you’re going to request something—request something the damned station never has the imagination to play. If I weren’t flat broke right now I would get satellite radio for the car.
One final bitch—who the Hell came up with the “Bob” concept? It might look good on paper to have a station that plays anything and everything but it is jarring to the ears. My mind just can't accept one minute hearing The Go-Go’s and the next something by Rush or Britney Spears followed by Ted Nugent. Ugh! My head feels like it will explode! I think the stations should at least stick to some sort of genre format.